Are you holding your heart in your hands?
As I write this I am feeling that the adage time flies is a massive understatement. It is astonishing to me that it is already December. And as the year quickly is drawing to a close I, like many others, find myself both reviewing the experiences of 2022 and envisioning the potential of 2023.
Viewing the year in retrospect has become a ritual for me each December. Certainly it helps me, actually grounds me, to contemplate what I accomplished over the past twelve months. My perspective can all too easily vanish amid breathtaking pace of life, often it feels just like I am barely keeping up. More importantly taking stock has become a way of measuring, of giving myself context.
Author and activist Grace Paley’s father wisely told her “The main thing is this — when you get up in the morning you must take your heart in your two hands.” I find this concept very powerful though the better word might be empowering.
This year in particular has held a particular poignancy as it was the first one post mom. I remain profoundly grateful for the time we had together in the last few years of her life but let me also acknowledge that I had for all intents and purposes been in quarantine for at least eighteen months prior to covid because of the immensity of her care.
During that period I often felt completely confined (which is honestly a nice word for feeling trapped). It was an experience I frankly had never imagined. Since my mid forties I had often felt like time was slipping through my fingers like water and one of the many emerging awarenesses that arose during this period was that in many ways somewhere along my journey I had started living what felt like a very small life. It wasn’t that I wasn’t grateful as I am so very blessed in so many ways, just that there was so very much more than I yearned to experience. Being so contained had created a powerful recognition, if I was honest with myself, that on a certain level I had essentially fenced myself in even prior to my mother’s care and I worried that life was passing me by so I promised myself that I would go after life with a certain gusto that I felt was missing when I reemerged.
Then about a month ago, shortly after the anniversary of my mother’s passing, my inner dialogue was busy berating me for essentially breaking that promise in this first year. I honestly don’t know what compelled me to do this but I grabbed a legal pad and wrote down everything I could remember that I had accomplished in 2022. The page filled and it became clear very quickly that my inner critic was having a field day based in an inner illusion.
As I gazed at my list the most beautiful thing wasn’t the quantity, though that was much larger than I had initially recalled, it was the quality of what was on the page. I had indeed consistently taken my heart in my two hands over the course of the year.
Traditionally Jupiter is the ruling planet of both Sagittarius and Pisces. Currently, we are in Sagittarius season and as I write this the Moon is in Pisces quickly moving towards Jupiter who is completing his once every twelve year journey through Pisces this month. In other words it is a very Jupiterian day. (Mercury and Venus are also currently in Sagittarius)
Jupiter is considered lucky because it is connected with the seat of our consciousness and makes connections of a higher order. Where Mercury describes how we take information and communicate it once it is processed, Jupiter represents the process of understanding itself. Our process determines our experience, and our experience determines our awareness, the way in which we view the world.
We tend to associate Jupiter with the happy go lucky Sag, and forget about the Sage. Sagittarius, at its best, is about the pursuit of meaning. Its traveling truth is not about wanderlust for its own sake, but for the exploring we must do, into unfamiliar territory, in order to broaden our internal horizons. Sagittarius is part of the journey of the mutable cross is where information becomes knowledge becomes wisdom becomes understanding/universal truth. When we have assimilated our experiences we move towards a greater wisdom and can take the proverbial leap of faith.
Many people look at the signs of the zodiac individually but the truth is they are all connected. Each shows a step on an eternal journey. Sagittarius leads us to Capricorn a sign that builds things of value and makes them real. It takes the wisdom that it has acquired and creates something from it.
As Rumi said “As you start to walk on the way, the way appears.” But truly be on the way we must also follow the ‘wisdom of holding our heart in our hands because the voice of our heart is the voice of your soul speaking to us. It is the guiding light, the inner true north, leading us along the path.
I invite you over the next few weeks as you begin to plan your intentions and resolutions for 2023 to pause and take stock, to ask yourself this question “Have I been taking my heart in my two hands?” Astrological truth states that the more we become aware of ourselves, our processes and our perceptions, the less will ‘happen’ to us from the outside. This is because the more aware we are, the more we are at one with the world.
I promise you it will be enlightening and support you in entering the new year full heartedly and on purpose. Remember what we give our attention to expands. Jupiter enters Aries heading into 2023 and it will be time to pick our battles.
